They were a wild, and ferocious, and a blood-thirsty people, believing in the tradition of their fathers, which is this—Believing that they were driven out of the land of Jerusalem because of the iniquities of their fathers, and that they were wronged in the wilderness by their brethren, and they were also wronged while crossing the sea;
How many of your beliefs are based on what your parents have taught you? You may not believe everything your parents teach you, but most of your actions and beliefs are at least influenced by what your parents have taught you. For example, your beliefs about drugs, pre-marital sex, and murder likely started with whatever your parents taught you. These are your traditions. Just as a family may have traditions of Family Home Evening, prayer, and eating dinner together, there are many families with traditions that can be detrimental to themselves and others. I have met a number of families in which the use of illegal drugs and other substances were not only allowed, but encouraged. Obviously there will be traditions in every family which are not necessarily correct.
Such is the case with the Lamanites. As noted in the scripture above, generations of Lamanites had been raised to believe the Nephites had swindled them. A look at the early chapters of 1 Nephi will help us see how their views became tainted.
For example, Lehi (see 1 Nephi 8) and Nephi (see 1 Nephi 11), each have a dream about the Tree of Life which, as we learn from 1 Nephi 11:22, is symbolic of the Love of God. By being humble enough to ask God to confirm this, anyone could have learned the truth of Lehi' dream. However, Laman and Lemuel were not the type to go and pray about much of anything (see 1 Nephi 15:9). So, how would they possibly explain this to their posterity? Well, how would you explain it, if you didn't believe it? Lehi and Nephi were dreaming about great and spacious floating buildings (see1 Nephi 8:26) and magical fruit from some magical tree. In modern times, we would likely diagnose Lehi and Nephi with having some sort of drug-induced psychosis. It is entirely possible that Laman and Lemuel simply believed that their father and brother were crazy!
Laman was the first volunteer to go to get the brass plates (see 1 Nephi 3:11). He and Lemuel also gave up their possessions in an effort to get the plates. When they shared this experience with their posterity, they likely left out the fact that they were complaining the entire time. Laman and Lemuel were also visited by an angel (see 1 Nephi 3:29). They probably did not tell their children about how they were beating Nephi. Laman probably also told his children how Nephi had stolen his birthright, ignoring the fact that the Lord had "chosen [Nephi] to be a ruler over [them], and this because of [their] iniquities" (see 1 Nephi 3:29).
As you read more of the writings of Nephi, you can see examples of situations in which Laman and Lemuel are seeing things from a different point of view. These differences could have been resolved, had Laman and Lemuel been humble enough to go to the Lord with their difficulties, so that they could have been enlightened by the Spirit of God to better understand. How different the Book of Mormon could have been if only Laman and Lemuel had been willing to listen to the Spirit with their hearts and minds, rather than only listening to words with their ears!
How many times have you watched a movie or read a book in which a character eavesdropped on a portion of a conversation and became offended, even though they had not stayed around long enough to get the entire picture. Luckily, television shows and movies generally allow these unfortunate misunderstandings to be resolved with happy endings.
Sadly, too many of us habor hatred toward others simply because we haven't been willing to look at a situation from all angles.
In some situations, we may be in the right and others have feelings of hatred towards us. Understanding another person's point of view does not mean we have to agree with them. However, taking the time to understand them often allows the hatred and hurt to fade away.
As a youth, I felt left out at church. There were many youth in the ward. They always seemed to have parties and would sit in the lobby in between classes - never inviting me to join them. It got to the point where I didn't even want them to invite me anymore, I would rather be on my own.I would walk around the inside of the church building to waste away time between Sunday School and Priesthood meeting. The oval shape of the hallways in LDS Churches makes a great walking track - I should have been thinner for all the time I spent there. For years I felt bitter about being left out. This is not to say that the experience consumed my life - I simply do not have any fond memories of those times from my youth. After all, wasn't The Church supposed to be inclusive? Even President Gordon B. Hinckley taught that one of three things every member of the Church needs is "a friend." Thus, I felt I had been denied something in my youth.
Not until years later did I learn, in a letter from my brother, that people had viewed me as being stuck-up and unapproachable. In other words, I had pushed away potential friends by walking around my "track" rather than making an effort to be outgoing. This is not to say that the other youth shouldn't have made an effort to include me, but that I was not entirely innocent in my feelings of bitterness about being left out.
In teaching a solution to divorce, President Hinckley taught, "If every husband and every wife would constantly do whatever might be possible to ensure the comfort and happiness of his or her companion, there would be very little, if any, divorce. Argument would never be heard. Accusations would never be leveled. Angry explosions would not occur. Rather, love and concern would replace abuse and meanness."
While you may not be married, there is an important principle that President Hinckley is teaching. You are probably familiar with The Golden Rule: "Whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them." (Matthew 7:12). President Hinckley is teaching us a higher law: to not just do to others what you would like to have done to you, but rather to do to others what they want to have done.
You may feel that others around you are doing you wrong. You may also be entirely correct in this belief. However, Jesus would teach you to serve those around you. It is the best way of resolving differences. Although the world may justify you for being mean to those that were mean to you first, it will never bring you happiness. I've seen too many families destroyed by this belief. If you are kind to others, you will feel an increase of happiness - regardless of what others may do to you.
Growing up in my family, I remember that one of my older brothers, Steven, and one of my older sisters, Lisa, did not always get along so well. I was too young to know all of the details, but I do remember that Lisa was tired of Steven not being very sensitive to anyone else's needs. So Lisa began an experiment. She began telling Steven, on an almost daily basis, "Steven, you're so sensitive." Impressively, she was able to say this without the sarcasm that so many of us might be tempted to include. At first, this approach did not seem to help. If anything, Steven's behaviors got worse. As time went on, however, Steven lived up to the expectations my sister had placed on him. Today Steven is grown up and is busy with work and a family of his own. However, he is often the first to respond when there are events within our family (such as deaths, marriages, graduations, etc.). He may not be completely perfect, but having had someone expect more of him (in this case my sister), his behavior became kinder and gentler.
It is true that we may not always understand why people act the way they do. Even when we ask them, they may not be willing to tell us. However, we should take the time to love them regardless of how they may treat us in return.
Anyone who has been baptized has promised to be sensitive to others' needs. As Alma taught those who were in hiding from the wicked King Noah, we must be"willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort... that [we] may have eternal life" (Mosiah 18:9).
While you may feel that others owe you this kind of loving treatment, it is far more important that you treat others in this fashion. You must live as an example of the Savior.
Goals for this week:
- Introduce yourself to someone new - whether at church or at school.
- Do something nice for someone else who you feel is being unkind to you.
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