Forsake your sins, and go no more after the lusts of your eyes.
It may seem strange to introduce the topic of media with a scripture about forsaking sins and not going after the lusts of our eyes. Nevertheless, media is often the lust of our eyes and our ears. How often do we schedule our evenings around what is on television that evening? How much time do we spend listening to music through headphones rather then engaging in conversation with those around us? While television and music are not necessarily horrible things, they can sometimes be perverted for the purposes of Satan.
Consider carefully the words of the prophet Alma to his wayward son, Corianton, “Forsake your sins, and go no more after the lusts of your eyes.” (Alma 39:9.) What else can the expression "the lusts of your eyes,” be applied to in our day? Movies, television programs, and video recordings that are both suggestive and crude. Magazines and books that are obscene and pornographic. Musical lyrics that promote violence and inappropriate sexual behavior.
As I meet with various youth, I inevitably hear about a song or a television show that, "really isn't that bad." I even hear adults talk about certain movies which have, as the adult will readily admit, "questionable language," but "hey, it is really funny."
Elder Cree-L Kofford noted, "All too often, we get ourselves enmeshed in the process of trying to understand why God gave us a particular commandment. We want to rationalize. I don’t know where that is more evident than in watching movies. Young people know they should not watch R- or X-rated movies, and yet time after time I hear them say, 'Well it’s only rated R because it’s violent.' What difference does it make why it is rated R? The fact is, a prophet of God has said not to go to R-rated movies. That ought to be good enough."
It is ridiculous to assume why God gave us a commandment in order to justify ourselves for breaking it. For example, would it be fair for me to kill someone because I believe that the commandment, "Thou shalt not kill," (Exodus 20:13) only applies to people that I like; not people I do not get along with? I would hope that you would agree that such justification is contrary to God's commandments. Thus, why should we justify ourselves in watching R-rated movies, viewing pornography, or listening to music with inappropriate lyrics?
Sadly, there will always be those who will try to justify the little things that are wrong with their movies or music by arguing that it is not really that bad, or that the good points outweigh the bad.
To these people Nephi spoke, "And others will [Satan] pacify, and lull them away into carnal security. ...
"And behold, others he flattereth away, and telleth them there is no hell; and he saith unto them: I am no devil, for there is none - and thus he whispereth in their ears, until he grasps them with his awful chains, from whence there is no deliverance" (2 Nephi 28:21-22).
Marvin J. Ashton challenged youth, "cooperate with parents who are concerned about your reading and your viewing. Be concerned yourself about what you take into your mind. Young people, you would never eat a meal of spoiled or contaminated food if you could help it, would you? Select your reading and your viewing carefully and in good taste."
When we justify watching a movie with only one or two sex scenes, because it has a good story, it is like eating a delicious meal with only one or two cockroaches in it. Do not justify sin, it is never worth it.
Elder M. Russell Ballard pointed out "often media's most devastating attacks on family are not direct or frontal or openly immoral. Intelligent evil is too cunning for that, knowing that most people still profess belief in family and in traditional values. Rather the attacks are subtle and amoral - issues of right and wrong don't even come up. Immorality and sexual innuendo are everywhere, causing some to believe that because everyone is doing it, it must be all right."
Just because "everyone is doing it," does not mean that you should. First off, not everyone is doing it. Furthermore, as Elder M. Russell Ballard taught:
"Now, I'm aware there may be a few of you who think that you know better than the leaders of the Church about this subject. You may even argue that there is artistic merit or that 'everyone is doing it.' You may believe that you are not one of those people who will be influenced by on-screen sex or violence. To you I have only one question: are you going to follow the true and living prophets or not? It really isn't any more complicated than that. The standard of the Church with regard to morality is clear. If you choose to read anything that contains material that is contrary to the moral standards of the Church, then you are placing yourself and your own wisdom above the counsel of God and His prophets - a course of action that would indeed be very unwise. As soon as you begin to think that you know better than the leaders of the Church, that our counsel doesn't apply to you, you are stepping onto a slippery slope that has claimed far too many victims already. It takes real desire and unequivocal, unreserved faith to accept and to live prophetic counsel even when you may not completely understand it. Such sincere desire and simple faith has the power to guide you safely through every challenge you may face in your life."
You are never benefited by justifying sin - not even if others are doing it. However, you will always be blessed as you follow God's commandments, as given by his prophets. I once worked at LDS Family Services. One of my responsibilities included leading a therapy group for men with addictions to pornography. The men ranged from 18 to 60-plus. Nearly all of them got in to pornography thinking it was no big deal - that they could quit anytime. Only when they tried to quit did they realize how difficult it was. If you are involved in pornography, you may feel it would be easy to quit. You may feel it will not be a problem for you to give up prior to serving as a missionary. I promise that you will be surprised at how difficult of an addiction it will be to overcome - you may not even realize you are addicted. Seek help from your parents and bishopnow. Do not wait until just before your mission. Overcoming the pornography habit will take longer than you think. No matter how long it takes you will find great happiness when your life is in line with God's commandments.
The leaders of the Church are more "in touch" than you may give them credit for. As President Gordon B. Hinckley acknowledged, "You face tremendous temptation. It comes at you in the halls of popular entertainment, on the Internet, in the movies, on television, in cheap literature, and in other ways - subtle, titillating, and difficult to resist. Peer pressure may be almost overpowering. But, my dear young friends, you must not give in. You must be strong. You must take the long look ahead rather than succumbing to the present seductive temptation."
Follow the counsel provided in For the Strength of Youth regarding the forms of entertainment you choose.
Do not waste away your existence surfing the Internet or playing video games. This is not to say that these things are completely useless - they can be quite good for alleviating stress. However, they can often dominate one's life. Elder Steven E. Snow observed, "too often we are reluctant to enter the next stage, begin the next challenge. Maybe we are too comfortable, fearful, or lacking in faith. ... Our parents’ basement, with unlimited video games, may be more appealing than college, marriage, or a career."
You must be involved in developing other ways of coping with stress. As you prepare to serve as a missionary, Elder L. Tom Perry instructed, "you must recognize that missionary service is emotionally demanding. Your support system is going to be withdrawn from you as you leave home and go out into the world. Many of the ways you use now to cope with emotional stress - like hanging out with friends, going off by yourself, playing video games, or listening to music - are not allowed by the rules of missionary conduct. There will be days of rejection and disappointment. Learn now about your emotional limits, and learn how to control your emotions under the circumstances you will face as a missionary."
Learning now how to cope with stress will help you not only as a missionary, but throughout adulthood. Spend time learning new hobbies, playing sports, reading and writing. Do not isolate yourself, but become involved.
Elder Perry further observed, "more and more, young people are isolating themselves from others by playing video games; wearing headphones; and interacting through cell phones, e-mail, text messaging, and so on instead of in person. Much of missionary work involves relating face-to-face with people, and unless you set the bar higher in the development of your social skills, you will find yourself underprepared. Let me offer a simple suggestion: get a job that involves interacting with people."
Part of the problem with modern media is that it can become consuming. Why spend your time watching other people live their dreams instead of living out your own dreams? Get a job, get involved in the community and in Church activities - live your own life. As the Lord commanded, "Cease to be idle" (D&C 88:124).
Elder Dallin H. Oaks observed, "Some young people are amusing themselves to death - spiritual death." Do not skip Church youth activities to participate in other entertainments or community activities. Do not spend time surfing the Internet at the expense of serving the Lord through your church responsibilities. Do not devote time to downloading movies or music illegally. It is stealing, no matter how you try to justify it. Just as you would wish to be compensated for your work, pay others for the work they do.
Live your life by being creative. It takes no creativity to watch a movie or listen to a song. Spend your time learning new skills. It will take time, but you will feel greater satisfaction when you have accomplished such a task than you will at having memorized the lines of your favorite movie.
President Dieter F. Uchtdorf taught, "Everyone can create. You don’t need money, position, or influence in order to create something of substance or beauty. Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty."
Media can be wonderful when you seek out uplifting materials. Even then, do not let movies, television, music, pornography, or any other thing, prevent you from living your life. Spend your time in prayer learning what talents God has blessed you with. Then, go out and develop your talents.
Goals for this week:
- Get rid of any R-rated movies or inappropriate music you own. Stop watching any television shows that are not uplifting.
- If you are of age, get a job. Become involved with people face-to-face - not just through texting, e-mail, or chat rooms.
- Develop a hobby - learn to make things or fix things. These talents will help you deal with stress in an appropriate manner and provide you a sense of accomplishment.
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